I disagree with the saying that “Age ain’t nothing but a number.” Or
maybe I agree with it since the double negative makes the statement
actually mean “Age is something but a number.” Or is it a triple
negative with that “but,” leaving the original point intact? My
37-year-old head is confused.
My point is that age certainly does signify something more than a
number. We infer meaning from so many aspects of our lives — profession,
geographic location, physical appearance, education — that why should
age be the one attribute free of any semiotic meaning? It seems like
“Age ain’t nothing but a number” is just something that people say when
they want to justify hooking up with someone significantly older or
younger than they are.
Investing age with meaning doesn’t have to be all judgment and
snickering all the time. If we treated all people equally regardless of
age, we would lose the following benefits of our society:
Medicare
Social Security
Protection of children from pornography
Senior discounts at stores
Child labor laws
Dispensation from fasting for Catholics over 65
Child protective services
Free transportation for seniors
Free admission for kids to various events
Statutory rape laws
Pedophilia laws
General respect for the elderly
I’m exaggerating a little here because certain of the above are not
guaranteed to people solely due to their chronological ages. For
example, we protect kids from abuse because they’re unable to defend
themselves as well as adults, not just because their ages are in single
digits, and we offer healthcare to the elderly because they cannot very
well work until they die. Conversely, we wouldn’t deny the above
benefits to people who are more capable than their peers. We won’t deny
Medicare to 65-year-olds who run marathons and we won’t stop protecting
kids from abuse just because they look like they can take care of
themselves. It works both ways.
People can’t only disregard age when it flatters them while
continuing to accrue age’s benefits. My age isn’t the totality of me but
I will not deny that my age definitely has real meaning rather than
just being two random numbers. To say that a person’s chronological age
has no meaning is almost to deny time itself.
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