CAPITALIZATION and the lack thereof

Hey, who’s up for a condescending lecture from a know-it-all writer? That’s what I thought. i will today discuss the scourge of INAPPROPRIATE CAPITALIZATION and i will also talk about the abuse of lowercase in american english.

If it’s not an acronym, do not capitalize it. This drives me to psychosis at my job. Companies all try to capitalize the names of their products so they stand out but it just looks stupid. OASIS does not stand for anything so it should just be Oasis. I always correct the capitalization. No errant uppercase letters shall pass.

Lady Gaga has also asked that journalists capitalize the name of her upcoming album, ARTPOP. I really doubt this is an acronym so it should be Artpop. I think it’s so obnoxious to capitalize something just so it will stand out and ignorant that you try to bend the rules of composition just to benefit yourself. ALL CAPS ARE ALSO HARD TO READ, JUST LIKE THIS. I BELIEVE THERE WAS A STUDY ON THIS SUBJECT. IT GIVES ME A HEADACHE. TRY READING THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE’S ALERTS AND YOU’LL SEE WHAT I MEAN. PLUS, SPELCHECK DOSEN’T WORK ON ALL CAPS SO THERE IS A GREATER RIKS OF ERRORS.

If you capitalize too much, it’s like you’re screaming at people. Why are you screaming at people? Are you trying to make enemies?!

Don’t get me started on lowercase. If you want to spell your name in small letters, fine, but if it’s the first word in a sentence, it still needs to be capitalized. k.d. lang starting off a sentence makes my teeth hurt. (This is the fault of writers and editors and not lang.) When you start a sentence with her name, either capitalize the “K” or rewrite the sentence so her name does not start it. Writers always send us articles and in the references, include people whose names start with small letters, like von Schweinhund. If it starts a sentence, you still have to capitalize the “V.”

You might say, “Oh, but it’s not supposed to be capitalized.” Well, “the” is not supposed to be capitalized normally but when it starts a sentence, it’s “The.” The (see?) lowercase spelling of someone’s name, elective or not, does not trump the basic rules of composition.

We live in a world of rules, people.