The scene is the
Official Investigation Chamber in Congress. A group of highly placed officials
is investigating the congressmen who investigated FBI Director James Comey, who
investigated Hillary Clinton’s emails.
House Speaker Paul
Ryan: Congressman Gowdy, thank you for obeying the subpoena to appear here
today. We are trying to get to the bottom of some statements you made last week
while interrogating Director Comey. Did you or did you not ask him if Secretary
Clinton said, “I did not e-mail any classified
information to anyone”?
Rep.
Trey Gowdy: That is true, Mr. Speaker.
Ryan: And is it
also true that Director Comey said, “That's a harder one to answer. We found
traces of work related emails in — on devices or in space. Whether they were
deleted or when a server was changed out something happened to them, there's no
doubt that the work related emails that were removed electronically from the
email system.”
Gowdy:
That is also true, insofar as that was the gist of his comments to me vis-a-vis
the question I posed.
Vice
President Joe Biden: In other words …
Gowdy:
… Yes.
Sen.
Mitch McConnell: I’d like to address a question to
Congressman Chaffetz. Did you ask Director Comey, “Did you review the documents
where Congressman Jim Jordan asked her specifically and she said, quote, there
was nothing marked classified on my emails, either sent or received?”
Rep. Jason Chaffetz:
I do not recall.
Ryan: You do not
… what? What?
Chaffetz: I do
not recall.
Biden: But you
did tell Director Comey he would in the next few hours be getting a referral
from Congress to investigate Secretary Clinton’s statements?
Chaffetz (confers with lawyer for 30 seconds with
hands over microphone): I do not recall.
McConnell: Moving
on. Congressman Cartwright, I do believe you asked Director Comey about the “c”
designation on Secretary Clinton’s emails indicating the email was classified.
I believe you asked “Was there a header
on the three documents that we’ve discussed today that had the little ‘c’ in
the text someplace?”
Rep. Matt Cartwright:
That is correct.
McConnell: And
what was Director Comey’s response?
Cartwright:
Director Comey indicated to me that in three emails, the letter “c” was in the
body of the text but there was no header in the email or the text.
Biden:
Three emails?
Cartwright:
Yes, three.
Ryan:
I would like to discuss some of Congressman Gowdy’s snark and sarcasm during
the investigation. Congressman, you made a statement to Director Comey that “In
the interest of time and because I have a plane to catch tomorrow afternoon,
I'm not going to go through any more of the false statements.” You also said “You
and I both know intent is really difficult to prove. Very rarely do defendants
announce 'On this date I intend to break this criminal code section. Just to
put everyone on notice, I am going to break the law on this date.'” Do you
think your tone was appropriate here?
Gowdy
(sighing heavily and rolling his eyes):
Yeah, I guess.
There
are several long seconds of silence.
Biden:
Well, I think we’ve learned everything we can learn today. Motion to adj—
Suddenly,
the doors at the back of the chamber fly open and Pope Francis, United Nations
General Secretary Ban Ki-Moon and Apple CEO Tim Cook walk in.
Pope
Francis: Nobody move! We are investigating the
investigation of the investigation of the investigation. Vice President Biden,
Speaker Ryan and Sen. McConnell, take your seats and prepare yourselves. Your
testimony begins in five minutes.
Repeat
as necessary.
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