Wednesday, January 8, 2020

SNOW SQUALL!


WEATHER ALERT! WEATHER ALERT! SNOW SQUALL SCHEDULED TO HIT THE AREA AT 9:15 A.M.!

Are you ready for it? Are you ready for the SNOW SQUALL? It’s coming soon! Very soon! It may have already hit your area!

Check back for specific details on what time the SNOW SQUALL will strike your area! Marking the time will help you remember where you were when the WHITE WALL OF DEATH enveloped you!

SLOW DOWN! SLOW DOWN for the SNOW SQUALL! For the love of GOD, SLOW DOWN!

WAS THE ALERT LOUD ENOUGH FOR YOU? DID YOU THINK A CHILD HAD BEEN KIDNAPPED WHEN YOU HEARD YOUR PHONE SCREAMING?

No, it’s a SNOW SQUALL, one of nature’s most dangerous phenomena! You think the Australian wildfires are bad? Well, they’ve got nothing on a few minutes of SNOW that everyone will forget about five minutes after it ends! BATTEN DOWN THE HATCHES!

What are you doing? YOU’RE NOT GOING SLOW ENOUGH! SLOW DOWN HARDER!

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