A Little Corner of Life

Once we finally become parents, our lives will change profoundly. Evenings of idly watching prestige TV will give way to corralling the entropy of scattered toys. I say bring it on. It will not be a walk in the park and I’m nervous but I am ready to take on the challenges. 

What I am wondering about is how much I am going to be able to continue writing. I just read two articles with opposing viewpoints; one said having a baby kills creativity and the other says parenthood spurs creativity. It won’t be a question of material. I’m sure having a child in our lives will inspire me greatly and make for plenty of fodder for stories, blogs and poems. Fatherhood has already inspired me and it’s not even here yet.

The question here is when do I do all that writing? I must sound so spoiled: “Oh, woe is me, when will I be able to write my Great American Novel?” But I know that while our child will rapidly climb the Billboard Hot 100 of our priorities (debuting at #1 with a bullet), I also know about the importance of keeping myself balanced and saving a little corner of life for myself. I think that little break can lead to a saner parent and thus, a better-adjusted child.

I’ve done some of my best work on the fly, like writing a poem while bored at a conference or coming up with an idea for a blog on my way to work and throwing it together in five minutes before posting. I work quickly without revisions (which has positives and apparent negatives, given my very low publishing rate). I’d like to think that I’m somebody who could write with my right hand while using my left hand to change a diaper or fold laundry.

But who knows what the practical reality will be once we have a child in our lives. One thing I’m sure of about parenting is that I won’t know what it’s really like until I know what it’s really like.

Maybe there’s something too egocentric in continuing to write about TV shows and bad grammar and the weather as a metaphor for whatever bloviating topic when there are so many other important things to do. Maybe there’s too much “I” in my writing when I’d really like to escape ego at this point in my life and expand my forcefield to take in someone new to nurture and love and guide.

I want to continue writing whenever possible, though. I want to snatch whatever seconds from the day and scraps of paper from the detritus of my new life as I can and fill them with something. I want to at least try to instill in our child a love of the arts, of music and books and paintings and TV and movies. Even if he doesn’t take to any of those things, I want our child to see that I’m still writing and even if I never get anything published, that at least I tried.