Smell My Mandles

First there were manscaping, manties, man caves and mandals. Now we have to put up with man candles, which I guess we can call … sigh … mandles. Yankee Candle sells these things. I could infer that the 2x4 candle smells like sawdust and the Riding Mower smells like cut grass. 

However, when I heard about First Down, it confused me. Would it smell like … a football? Turns out it incorporates the scents of orange, patchouli, vetiver and leather. Aside from leather, I don’t know how any of those scents signify football and don’t even know what vetiver is. This is a dumb idea for trying to associate a scent with something that has no smell. 

There’s also the Man Town candle, which smells like spices, woods and musk, because the smell of musk would be welcoming in a mass quantity that fills the room. Sign me up.

I don’t understand the point of this. I can see people wanting to smell sawdust or mown grass but those smells would just remind me of work. I would light these candles and think of the home projects I’m too lazy to tackle or the lawn I should mow. I don’t need a football candle. I’ll just watch the game. 

I wonder if Yankee Candle has a mandle called BBQ. I would absolutely love a candle that smells like a barbecuing steak or burger. Actually, it might be a bad idea because food scents just make people hungry. I’m sure I’d be disappointed if I lit a candle and smelled steak but still had hours to go until dinner. Maybe a BBQ candle would be good for some people in the winter to remind them of summer but I barbecue all year so I don’t need such a candle. A sunscreen candle might be nice but not a particularly male scent. 

There’s not much a need to separate scents for men and women. Unless it’s something ultra feminine, men can enjoy it. Both men and women can appreciate a candle that smells like the beach or the rain or cotton. 

It’s just another obnoxious example of slapping “man” on every type of product. It works to signify some things that men don’t usually use, like a man purse, but I don’t understand the point of words like mandals for men’s sandals. Men have always worn sandals. It’s not like some recent trend of men doing something historically female. It just makes people sound stupid when they use the word. 

I’m not one for scented candles anyway.