Things to Do in October

It’s all over but the crying. Even though the season didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to, I did enjoy watching the Phillies, and will miss them in the off-season. They at least made a bit of a run in September, avoided the indignity of a losing season and I have some hope for next year. Still, it was painful to watch the Nationals clinch the National League East and for the Phillies’ divisional dynasty to end.

Let’s look on the bright side: I’ll have a bit more free time this October. For the first time in six years, I won’t have to stay up late watching playoff games and holler at the TV. Yay? So here’s a list of things I can do for the rest of the month to pass some time.

* Throw baseballs at my life-size cardboard cutout of Bryce Harper
* Laugh at the Mets, who still finished below the Phillies
* Strategically root against any MLB playoff team that has stymied the Phillies since 2007
* Clean the house
* Cry and collect the tears in my 2008 World Series glass
* Bang my head on the wall
* Offer a prayer of thanks for not having to listen to Joe Buck
* Plan our wedding
* Be especially vigilant of falling lead pipes
* Read a book
* Eat a cheesesteak topped with bitterness
* Devise a highly conceptual Halloween costume that will be discussed through the ages
* Catch a Flyers ga … oh, wait …
* Watch the DVD of the 2008 season on a loop until April, sighing heavily the whole while

Enjoy your month!