There’s a hurricane a-comin’! Or it’s a-stayin’ out to sea!
Either way, rain and wind are happening this weekend so here are some tips to
prepare yourself for Hurricane Joaquin.
• Scream “SANDY! SANDY! SANDY!”
at the top of your lungs to anyone who will listen.
• Board up your windows and
doors but remember to do it from the outside.
• Joaquin Phoenix movie
marathon!
• Go to the deli and ask for
hurricane lunchmeat. Do this at every supermarket until you find one that will
sell it to you.
• You can reduce your risk of
destruction by up to 75 percent if you spraypaint “STRONGER THAN THE STORM” on
your house.
• Buy several cases of bottled
water. If you don’t drink all of it, just throw it in the trash after the storm
passes.
• It’s hard to drive in the rain
so prepare now by slowing down and generally not being able to handle it.
• Don’t BBQ indoors to get away from
the rain. It just doesn’t taste the same.
• Whenever people invoke a
comparison to Hurricane Sandy, indignantly correct them that it’s “Superstorm
Sandy.”
Good luck!
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