Let's make Jennifer Hudson balloon

I really wish Jennifer Hudson would start packing on the pounds again so we wouldn't have to see her Weight Watchers commercial every 4.3 seconds.

I am sick of it. Indescribably sick. I never again want to hear the song "I Believe in You and Me" again. I don't like that song. I don't care about it. I don't care that Whitney Houston sang it and she's dead now and Jennifer Hudson is our designated mourner. I just DON'T. WANT. TO HEAR. THAT SONG. EVER AGAIN. At least they switched the song up a little so it's not the same clip of Hudson singing. It's slightly more bearable that way.

I also did not care for her singing "Feeling Good" in these Weight Watchers commercials. I don't like that song at all. I'm not going to like that song just because some sanctified dead diva sang it originally. I didn't care for Muse's cover version either. Put that song out to pasture, please.

It was ridiculous to me when Hudson started those commercials, especially when they showed the new thin Hudson next to the "chunky" Hudson on American Idol. This juxtaposition just emphasized how she really didn't look that bad before. She's thinner now but she wasn't exactly Mama Cass earlier. I thought she looked fine.

I guess I should give her kudos for keeping the weight off for the last 19 years (it seems like it's been that long due to the duration that this commercial has been on the air). Companies like Weight Watchers and Jenny Craig must drop their celebrity spokespeople after they gain back any of the weight they lost, which is why few of them last long. But I'm sick of looking at Hudson. You lost like 20 pounds: Good for you, seriously. It's not easy to do and maintain. But I feel like in watching this person repeatedly that I have to keep applauding every time she comes on the screen. There's only so much congratulations I can offer for this kind of accomplishment. Should I mint a medal? Throw a parade? Offer her the key to the city? I know how insane it sounds to have this reaction to a commercial but I just can't watch it again.

So I'm taking up a collection of food and sending it to Jennifer Hudson. I'm buying Oreos in bulk at the dollar store and Pop Tarts and bacon and tacos and non-lean hamburgers and potato chips and marinating it all in high fructose corn syrup and sending her a care package. I urge you all to do the same. Let's force someone to change her body so I won't be annoyed during my syndicated sitcoms.